Building a healthy, stable relationship is like building a stable house. You want to be sure that the foundation is sound and that it is built to weather the storms.
When dating, often the first thing we look for is physical attraction. While this can be important, it certainly is not a good foundation for a relationship. Would you build a beautiful home on a sandy beach? A person’s physical appearance changes over time. Similar to how sand shifts, if the foundation of a relationship is physical attractiveness then
that relationship is very likely to crumble.
Other things that can be great stones in a relationship may include a person’s career choice, interest in hobbies, or sense of humor. While these are important in a relationship, they should not be the foundation. Careers can change, hobbies can change and things you consider fun likely will over your lifetime. These qualities along with physical attractiveness are “bonus” qualities to the relationship. The foundation should be different.
Bigger components in a relationship that should be part of the foundation include qualities like loyalty, forgiveness, honesty, and values. Can you trust them? We all make mistakes…will they hold your mistakes against you or will they forgive you? Do they have similar or different values than you do? These are all things to take into consideration when you are building that foundation of your relationship. If you’ve built your relationship on qualities like these then you’ll have something to fall back on when things get tough.
The best foundation on which to build a relationship is your shared faith in Christ. God will always be there for you. He does not change as you age. You can find comfort in knowing that He has a plan for you and your relationship and that you can rely on Him for anything. When a storm comes into your relationship, He will be there to help you pick up whatever pieces there may be TOGETHER. You, your date, and Him.
If you are seeking a lasting, stable relationship then build it on a firm foundation – one that will weather life’s storms and help you grow together. There are many qualities in a relationship that are important but there is only One Foundation.